Vintage Supahmama

December 16th, 2009 (original titled, "But wait, it's only Wednesday!!!")

Mere technicality, people... mere technicality. It's more like a TMI meets 7 quick takes, but there will probably be more than 7 takes and I don't do quick. Nor do I do things on a suggested schedule. Take that, schedule! I'll do my TMI when I want to!

So here goes nothing. This is my TMI thursday post numero uno. On Wednesday. Because that's how I ROLL, ya'll.

• I am SCARED SHITLESS of aliens. For real. Like, the first and only time I willingly sat through "Signs" I thought I was going to throw up when that alien walked past the alley during that Mexican kid's birthday party. It remains my NUMBER ONE scariest movie moment ever. I couldn't go outside to smoke at night to save my life for over a month. So I just didn't smoke at night, unless I ran to my car, drove around the neighborhood (I could easily run over an alien... duh...) and smoke my pretty little blonde brains out. Those were the good old days... when my Mother still paid for my gas and I lived in her house and she pretty much paid for everything. THOSE WERE THE DAYS.
• In 12 hours my husband will be undergoing surgery for some shoulder repair and I will likely be sitting here gnawing my fingernails off because he'll be ONE COUNTY AWAY, 20 MINUTES DRIVE AND WHAT IF THEY SLIP UP AND SEVER HIS ARM??!?!? That scenario is really NOT likely to happen, but seriously? What kind of wife doesn't sit diligently in the waiting room for her husband to be wheeled into recovery all in one piece? This one apparently. But only because he insisted that I oversee that the kids diapers are actually changed when they crap themselves. Maybe it's just more because my kids that get serious diaper rash after .05 seconds of pooping.
• I've woken up three days in a row to a bedroom without kids in it and I have to admit, I wallowed in the baby-free silence. It was WONDERFUL. And then the baby monitors lit up like a man on fire... and I missed my kids... and my ovaries screamed, "MOAR BABBY PLZ!" Fucking ovaries.
• Also? I'm totally having my Mirena removed. Why? BECAUSE THE PAST 8 MONTHS HAVE SUCKED ASS. Ridiculous acne (and I have that awesome cystic acne that causes some serious scarring), NO drive for anything, panic attacks every 2-3 days, insomnia coupled with exhaustion, 40 pound weight gain... FORTY POUNDS. fml. F-M-L. When I called to ask my midwife if any/all of these symptoms could be related to my Mirena she called back and the first thing she asked was when do I want to schedule to have it removed. Seriously? Is this THAT COMMON? Because FORTY POUNDS, PEOPLE. It's funny that I think back over the past year and it was almost like an on/off switch was flipped when I had it placed. Before April I was doing yoga every day and religiously entering in my food intake on livestrong.com's daily plate journal. I was also on top of my fucking game (well, as much as i could be with two kids in diapers.) I had asked some friends on Facebook to contact me if they had the Mirena and all but ONE PERSON contacted me with negative things to say about it. Four out of five Facebook friends AGREE that Mirena blows. One friend is so determined to keep hers in despite the side effects that she's on a sleep aid for the insomnia, adderol for the drive and energy issue, and an anti-depressant to battle the well, depression. Here's my issue with this, I am not about to take 3 extra pills just because my birth control is screwing me up. SPECIFICALLY when I chose this method to ensure my I was covered seeing as I have problems remembering to take my medication and I'm already on medication for generalized anxiety and depression disorders. On that note, anybody got bad things to say about a cervical cap or diaphragm? I'm all ears at this point so long as it doesn't involve hormones of any kind.
• Thinking of quitting smoking with the aid of Green Smoke. All of the reviews appear to be positive reviews more than likely paid for by Green Smoke themself. HOWEVER, I've been following "Ex-hot Girl" and her little vlogs on the subject have given me hope. If I don't blow my Christmas cash, I might quite possibly invest in a starter kit.

The Husband has suggested I finish this NOW so he can read it before bed. I'm pretty sure I could have kept going for an hour or more seeing as I haven't posted anything of real value in quite some time. Enjoy my one reader (i.e. husband)... oh, and Sam might be reading too... if so? HI, SAM!