Whether or not the other person is 1 or 10 or 100 years old… when you have always been independent and you add children into the mix it is no longer about you, nor is it no longer about worrying about being dependent on someone else as you have these little people who are dependent on you.
When you are not patient you show them that that is how it is supposed to be. When you are emotional, they get the ok to go with their own emotions. When you are selfish, they see that it’s ok to be selfish as well. Patience, mentality, dependence… we all want what’s best for our children and we want other people to do the same for us, but how can we expect that treatment from others when we are so impatient ourselves?
How do we expect our own children to learn to save their money when we can’t keep our fingers out of our own piggy banks, and let’s not even talk about our bank accounts? Why is it ok for us to act this way and not our children, neighbors, peers, or elders? Fact of the matter is, it isn’t.
I know I need to work on my patience and anxieties. I know that I have days where self control is an issue. I know that I want my children to be better people than myself, but I also know that they’re only going to learn it firsthand from their parents. How can they learn to work as a team when all they see are independent people in their lives who think that it’s always their way or the highway?
Something has to give and as I was gently reminded this morning, battles have to be chosen and others ignored. It’s stupid to fight in general, but some things are worth fighting for like wanting to see my children grow up to be better people than me.