Wednesday, October 19, 2011

I have NEVER...

My name is Tiffany.
I am 29 years old and apparently APPALLINGLY boring. You're welcome. I have never...

  1. Been to France.
  2. Held a chimpanzee, specifically not one named Mr. Pickles.
  3. Taken a train out of state.
  4. Done crack. CRACK IS WHACK.
  5. Been great at socializing UNLESS I was already surrounded by a big group of friends.
  6. Run a mile without falling over in an asthmatic heap at some point before the finish line.
  7. Liked tofu. Not ever, not once, I don't care how you make it, you can take it and SHOVE IT.
  8. Liked white chocolate or caramel. I would rather starve for a week than suffer through either choice.
  9. Had a root canal.
  10. NOT cried when my kids get shots or have to endure pain. I think I cry before THEY cry ((unless we're talking about Lillie... she doesn't cry, she gets even.))
  11. Shopped at Trader Joe's.
  12. Been to the Jersey shore.
  13. Driven a hybrid.
  14. Gone to college unless it was to visit.
  15. Swam with the dolphins.
  16. Been a country fan (outside of Dixie Chicks... do they count? WAIT, is Taylor Swift country? HELP!!! I'M LOST IN "TWANG" AND "TEARDROPS IN MY BEER!!!")
  17. Had the pleasure of getting a tattoo. Mystery inks and metal allergies make me break out into hives. Literally.
  18. Been as ballsy as I was at 17. Where DID that girl go???
  19. Been to a shuttle launch.
  20. Witnessed a shooting star without first panicking over the slight chance that it might be ALIENS.
  21. LOVED meat.... even though I can testify to surviving fried rabbit and craving red meat while pregnant with Lo.
  22. been "right" in the head.

Thanks, Mama Kat for yet ANOTHER fabulous prompt (stolen from the Pioneer Woman, lol.)


  1. Laughing. No tofu? C'mon! It doesn't have a taste! And no caramel? Girl, that's just unAmerican! ;-)

    I love ya!!

  2. So you named the Zero bar. We wondered.

    I have welcomed shuttle astronauts home to Houston. Probably not nearly as good, but it felt patriotic or something.

  3. This list could be my list! Except for #9. You don't know how lucky you are! :P

  4. Could live without root canal and white chocolate for sure, couldn't live without Trader Joe's!
    Like your list!

  5. M! UnAmerican? PSHHHHH, WHATEVER! Dark Chocolate is where it's at!!!

    Maggie, the Zero bar? As in the Candy Bar? EW. As for patriotism, I used to fly for a Charter Airline that brought troops back and forth for R&R and end of missions. Feel as if I've done my "Patriotic Duty" for a lifetime. ;)

    Leslie, I worry that #9 is going to come faster than I want it to. It's been TOO long since I've been to the dentist.

    Jen, Next time I'm in Chicago, I'm pretty sure there is a Trader Joe's within walking distance of my hotel. I'm going straight there (more because HOLY COW at room service prices than anything else!!!)

  6. I like your list. If you get to the Jersey Shore please let me know and I will gladly drive an hour to meet you! Or may I suggest the romantic shore town of Cape May? Not with me though.

  7. Emily, if you could afford to be my Sugar Mama, WHO KNOWS... Maybe I WOULD go with you to the romantic shore town of Cape May! Thanks so much for commenting! One of my "Rosie Show" friends lives near the shore and she's already offered to mark that one off my list. :) Maybe I can make it one great big meet up!!!

  8. I burst out laughing at #20 b/c I'm telling you THEY'RE COMING FOR US. It was like three years ago, we saw the shooting star and I swear the whole sky glowed. We damn near made a u-turn. DON'T GO TO THE LIGHT, CAROL ANN!

  9. Never been to France, you must go.... will meet you there when you make it. I held a monkey once (don't think it was a chimp), but it's overrated, I wouldn't worry about that one. Great list. F

  10. I wish my family had made it to a shuttle launch!

  11. Very fun ... and you're not boring. Actually you sound a bit like me. So maybe we're both boring! :)

    Thanks for stopping by Snapshots! :)

  12. #9 is pretty darn crappy. I've had TWO, and they both happened during holidays!

  13. Arnebya, Glad I'm not the only one dreading our impending DOOOOOOOM!

    Fiona, My Mom had a monkey, therefore I was never allowed to have one.

    JDaniel, I wish we had too. My son would have loved it!

    Morgan, Let's both be boring together!!!

    Just Another Mom, Don't jinx me! I don't WANT a root canal, not now, not at Christmas, NOT EVER!!!

  14. Wonderful list! I definitely would love to do 3,6,15,19. :) Question: What is it about tofu that you hate?

  15. Oh, tofu! How do I loathe thee? I can't stand the texture (any which way it's cooked) and I can't handle the lack of flavor or the absorption of the other flavors it's cooked with. I just. I can't.

  16. I too have never been great at socalizing.. it feels all so awkward to me. Tofu.. that's where we kids and I love it.

  17. Done the root canal thing, and oh so not fun!!!!

  18. Sorry about the Trader Joe's thing. That's just tragic. But that ballsy 17 year old girl you've lost? Guess what? She comes back! I just turned 50, and I suddenly have balls that my 17 year old could have only dreamed of!

  19. No tattoo's over here either. Not because I oppose them, I just don't think I would ever like any design enough to want it FOREVER.

  20. Oh my gosh...I've tried tofu a million different ways and it is G-ROSS!!!! Thanks for visiting my space!

  21. Dominique, more power to you and your crazy tofu loving family! If it ever enters my household, I'll gladly forward it your way. :)

    Tima, I'm super grateful to have not had to go through that... yet.

    Gretchen, isn't the lack of Trader Joes in my life TRAGIC??? I just can't see driving INTO Atlanta to experience it. Also? Can't wait for my cojones to come back!!!

    Saucy B, I would love a tattoo. LOVE ONE. I even have my design in mind. :(

    Elastamom, Tofu haters unite!!! And you're very welcome, any time!

  22. I have never had tofu and just the name is enough to turn me off I mean seriously it sounds like a 2 yr old saying toe food momma .. umm yeah.
    I have never held a chimp either, never been to France although I have been to Paris, KY bwhahahaha.

  23. Angel, High five for being a tofu-hater. Good to see I'm not alone. My redneck/hillbilly family CONSTANTLY asked me when I was going to Paris, KY. It was all I could do to simply shake my head instead of slapping them upside theirs. Good thing you're not family. ;)

  24. We have so much in common - I have never nor will I ever be right in the head and tofu is as foreign as a fish taco. I may have you beat on the last time I've been to the dentist...I could show you a thing or two about caramel though, that make the world right. Great list!

  25. You had me at "Coffee Lovin'"

    That is HERESY about the caramel. I WILL NEVER LOVE THAT ^&*(^5%^&*).

  26. Hello, there! I've never swam with Dolphins, either. I could have sworn I already returned the Mama Kat visit, but I guess not. Sorry about getting back here so late!

    Thanks for stopping by my place for the workshop - I'll try to be a better neighbor from here on out!

  27. Kim, I'm a horrible blogger seeing as I'm JUST NOW getting around to responding to your comment. I'll try to be a better responder if you promise to be a better neighbor. :) While I've never swam with dolphins, I *have* witnessed a whole school (are they considered a school?) of them in the gulf while coming in to land in Pensacola. That? Was pretty damn amazing.