Childcare $600/month
Rent $880/month
Power $150/month
Gas $80/month
Water $60/month
Auto Insurance $125/month
Auto Gas $80/month
Comcast $60/month
Groceries $300+/month
$2335
Several hundreds maybe thousands in credit from accounts opened prior to our divorce being ignored because I can barely afford necessities on our current income.
You want to complain about how unhealthy we are, how lazy we must be... you drill this into the heads of our children. You belittle and demean them. You spend 36 hours with them every other week and it’s like pulling teeth for you to spend more time than that with them. You live less than 2 miles away.
Does your daughter threaten to kill herself in YOUR presence between both giggling hysterically and sobbing like she’s never done in the 9 years leading up to this past summer. Does your son throw punches and break things while exclaiming between choking cries that he hates the YOU in HIM? Does Lukas grasp your arm and scream “daddy” as you have to lock his door for his safety? Do you have holes in your walls where he’s dug the drywall out when he can’t sleep? Are you having to visit food pantries and humble yourself for assistance at Christmas because you just can’t do it this year?
This. All of this is why I filed to have you held accountable for the three children you assisted and nurtured alongside me for 10 years. It took my truck dying yet again just in time for the holidays, possibly losing Lou’s SSI for an unknown amount of time because I physically couldn’t make it to the social security office thanks to the truck dying the night before the schedules re-evaluation meeting, and having to beg for help from my family in clearing up debt accrued during the marriage so I could fall asleep knowing they weren’t going to take my paycheck.
I hope you lie awake at night aching the way I do, praying to any God that will listen that you don’t fail your children as much as you did the previous day. I hope she was worth the shit relationships you’re destined with your kids that you’re settling for. I pray that the pain and hurt you’ve filled our kids comes back to you tenfold.
I was done. I was so ready to just have you, the source of so much grief and anxiety out of our home. I was blinded by my anguish that I didn’t fill in one critical spot on the paperwork and it has shorted our kids. None of this is fair for them, but taking pity on their homeless, unemployed, “disabled” father was the worst injustice I could have served them. You went from a man who could barely leave bed to a man who can work 40 hours a week to support his bride and her children?
Go. Fuck. Yourself.
At least then, you wouldn’t have to worry about bringing MORE children into the world that you’ll inevitably regret and ignore into their adult years.
